Something that comes up ALL THE TIME in my coaching sessions today, thoughts on how life would be A LOT easier if….etc…
Life would be a LOT easier if only other people (boss/partner/sister/ex) changed what they were doing/saying so it suited us better or was (what we perceived to be) better for them.
If other people were more reliable/fun/on to it/organised/truthful/adult/
Giving up the illusion that other people could/should/will change to suit us is a huge personal growth milestone.
People will never change unless THEY want to.
Even then it might not be consistent or lasting.
People will not change unless they want to and are READY to.
You can try and cajole, beg, guilt, shame, plead…use logic, use emotion, but until it’s what they want and are ready for it’s not going to happen. It will be their timetable, not yours.
They will be ready when they are ready.
(Which might be NEVER)
Change is hard – it requires choice and commitment.
Parking the need for others to be different in order for us to be happy is HUGE
It allows us to put that wasted energy where it can make a genuine difference
The ONLY place we can truly effect change
P.S. Ready to make some first steps towards supported change where you can make change the most easily? Well then, I have your back! Here are three ways to work with me:
Book: Start using the 16 easy-to-implement mental and emotional health tips from my newest (super pretty, super effective) book, 101 Self Care Ideas.
Course: Dive into this short course and get your mind on what matters most…feel different inside and out in just 2 weeks, 14 Day Real Self-Care Kickstart.
Academy: My absolute number one recommendation is to join Wellbeing Warriors – there are so many modules in there to help you get unstuck. You will be so empowered with the immense personal insight you gain into yourself in the Coaching Academy that you will drop the desire to change others and relish the amazing change you are affecting in your own mental and physical health instead. It will change things for you more than you can ever imagine.