As I’m on my way to stand and speak in front of 100 amazing humans in Auckland, I thought I’d share a story about an email I received when I used to be a regular expert on breakfast TV in NZ. If you have something you are avoiding or a bit scared of committing to (New job? A date? A tricky conversation?) I think this one might be useful for you today.
“You are fearless” said the email “fearless! The way you put yourself out there. I couldn’t do that”.
Thank you, I said, but please don’t mistake my work rate for an absence of fear!
I love the perception of being fearless – but it’s far from the truth.
The truth is this:
The first time I did live TV I was terrified. Terr. I. Fied.
The second time I was still terrified.
The third time, I was terrified minus one percentage point.
Out of about a thousand.
When my book got published by Penguin and went “out there” into the world I was elated, excited but more than a little scared of what the reception might be to such a controversial wellness topic delivered in a pretty bullish style.
Each week when I pressed send on my column for The New Zealand Herald, knowing it will be read by tens of thousands – sometimes there is a little prickle of worry about how it might go down.
So, I’m absolutely not fearless despite how it may look!
Here’s how it works for me:
I have fear. Of course I do.
But I also have a message to share, and my message is bigger than my fear.
It has to be.
My fear of not doing what I am meant to do
My fear of not serving the world in the way I know I am here for
Is bigger than my fear of failing
Is bigger than my fear of looking stupid.
My message of self-empowerment around women’s mental, emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing
Is bigger than my fear of falling
Is bigger than my fear of not being perfect
I know I cannot really fail because even if I help one woman live bigger, reach higher, expand into the woman she is meant to be with the life and PEACE (of heart and mind) she deserves – I have done my job.
I know nothing is ever completely perfect. And I certainly am not!
So, I will keep taking perfectly imperfect action forwards.
Being fearless does not mean having no fear.
Being fearless means believing in something bigger than your fear.
So, that thing you are scared of? Can you believe in the having of it more than your fear? If we wait to be “not scared” to do something….we can wait (and waste) a lifetime. Choose that your conviction is bigger than your fear.