One of the things people ask me when they meet me is something along the lines of “Your life must be soooo perfect!”. Because I am a Life Coach people assume my life is perfection. All . The. Time. Don’t get me wrong, I have a life I love, full of amazing people, experiences and things I have consciously chosen – I consider myself very lucky. But – it’s still life …stuff happens to me too. Here are the four things many people assume about me which are just not true!
1. My life is perfect at all times.
Nope! This is life – I don’t get a free pass. Shit still happens! I just have the tools to deal with it in a different way. Being a Life Coach doesn’t stop bad stuff happening I am afraid – bad things still happen to good people – me included. A life coach’s life is part of her laboratory – so when stuff happens I try and use it as a learning experience, as an opportunity to use the techniques I know, and hopefully take some lessons that will help not just me, but you too. There is a saying in the Life Coaching community that “There is no such thing as a bad experience – it’s all just an opportunity for new material” and I guess to a certain extent that’s true.
But – no – I don’t have a magic bullet proof shield! I just have more tools and tricks than the next person to hopefully ease the ride over whatever has come my way.
2. I am just sort of wafting about each day and I don’t work that hard
This one is a really funny one. Because life looks very different to my old corporate days of a 50+ hour week and the commute and all that, sometimes it doesn’t look much like work – ie. sitting in my pajamas drinking organic decaf with my cat while writing an article. Hell – sometimes it doesn’t even feel like work! Coaching a really connected and ready client for example. But – I am working! I enjoy what I do, almost all of the time, so the less it looks and feels like work the better I know I a doing. That’s what work is meant to feel like. When you think of “working like a dog” think about the airport sniffer dogs – HOW much FUN are those dogs having?! Wagging their tails and running about. They LOVE their work. That how it’s meant to be. So – I very much try to “work like a dog”!
I am also stand out super lucky to be supported by a pretty incredible team who let me get on and do the bits of the job I love – working with clients, writing, teaching seminars, – whilst they do the admin, paperwork, finance and so on that is what actually keeps the show on the road.
I probably work about a 40 hour week these days: it just doesn’t feel like it!
3. That I am “analyzing them, right now” at a party
This one’s not new actually – people have been saying that to me at parties ever since I did my Pysch degree. “You’re analyzing me right now aren’t you?!” Nope sweetpea, I am enjoying the party and wondering where the chilled Sav is, just like the next person!
I don’t coach out of context and without permission. It would be weird and inappropriate! If a hairdresser suddenly whipped out scissors at a party and started trimming your fringe you would think that was invasive: how rude! It’s the same with coaching. It’s a fiercely effective discipline – but it needs to be in the right place with agreement about what the relationship entails from both parties.
Also – you know – I like to party and hang out and just talk about movies and whatnot just like everyone else!
4. That I “know everything” and I don’t have to do any coaching work ever on myself
I coach myself DAILY. Daily. Every. Single. Day. It’s how I stay in alignment (see the article I wrote about this last week called Congruence), live happy and do my best work both personally and professionally. I use the tools I teach and I journal, journal, journal.
If something feels off, I coach myself. If I am upset, I coach myself. If something doesn’t go to plan, I coach myself. If everything is okay, I coach myself. The tools might be different each time but it always comes down to doing the work consistently. It’s so not a chore. I can’t emphasize that enough. I love doing it. Because an investment of a few short minutes can realign my whole energy, perspective and day into one of productivity and joy. It’s the best investment of my time and energy there is. Coaching is freedom.
I also have a coach. He is amazing and a critical part of my self care team. I need my own coach as we all have blind spots. I want to operate at the top of my field and I know that investing in my own coach is an essential part of that. He brings a level of awareness to me that keeps me growing and expanding and being all I can be. It’s a fabulous process and I love it.
So – glad we cleared that up! I love getting questions from you – I am here to serve YOU – if you have a question or a topic you want me to write about in a future Wellbeing Wednesday please just get in touch!