Let’s talk a little about overthinking today. Here is an excellent graphic from @lizandmollie which I think many of us will relate to:
Here are two ways to get out of the tangle (or at least reduce the size of it!) and perceive the problem with perspective on its real size:
Strategy 1: Sort your physiology first. Too much caffeine makes the problem seem bigger and more complicated. Too little sleep makes the problem seem bigger and more unresolvable. Too much sugar – same effect. Ditto alcohol. Ditto too much obsessive scrolling in an attempt to numb the problem.
All these things make the problem seem MASSIVE and make it harder to solve. Step back from the tangle and SORT OUT YOUR PHYSIOLOGY FIRST. Get a proper sleep. Put your phone down. Eat a proper balanced meal. Regulate your caffeine intake. Take a deep breath from a place of a regulated nervous system and view your problem with fresh eyes.
Strategy 2: Zoom OUT. When it feels like a huge tangled mess of a problem, I want you to stop going round in circles, getting more and more tangled, and get a pen and paper and note down the answer to these 2 questions:
1. Define the problem in two sentences or less. (I know you want to write 3 sides of A4, DON’T! Force yourself to boil it right down to its core. Succinctness will help you. Two sentences or less).
2. Given the average female life span of 82 years (UK/NZ/AU) how much will this problem bother me 5 years from now? 15 years from now? 30 years from now? Feel your perspective shift as you Zoom Out. Solutions are much easier to come by from this zoomed out vantage point.
Here’s the thing, when we have a problem, we ALSO always have access to a solution. Why? Because if there were no potential solutions IT LITERALLY WOULDN’T BE A PROBLEM – IT WOULD BE A FACT. If it’s a FACT, we have no choice but to accept it. That’s the nature of a fact.
So, if we have a problem, even if it is one we have been wildly overthinking and get in a right old tangle over – the way out is to know, by the very definition of a problem, we must ALSO have potential solutions. We might not like them but they are there. They might require great courage or serious inconvenience, but they DO exist.
If we Calm Our Physiology, and Zoom Out, we will be able to see those solutions far more easily, I promise. The solution is there waiting for you to connect with it.
Do feel free to forward to someone who needs a little extra help right now to let them know you are thinking of them.
And, as ever, I wrote this blog for you – based on coaching thousands of smart people, for well over 15 years. It’s come from my emotional intelligence and extensive experience, not AI.
Have a great week, and if in doubt… ZOOM OUT!
