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2020 Live Happy Inspiration Love the Skin You're In New Year Positive Thought Strategy Reduce Stress Self Care and Self Love

Why you DON’T need a “New You” this New Year!

“Happy New Year! Happy New You!”

How many headlines will you see screaming that this month? Too many to count, I suspect – and I also suspect another level of “New You” hysteria given its the turn not just of the year – but of the decade.  It’s going to be “New You”- tastic out there!

Here is my direct take on that noise:

Contrary to a million headlines of “wisdom” – YOU DO NOT NEED A “NEW YOU”. 

The “You” you are is absolutely perfect in your imperfection. Anyone who tells you you are broken in some way is undermining your personal sovereignty. Especially anyone who tells you you are broken in order to sell something.

You are not broken! You, my darling,  are whole and complete.

Life and self-improvement is a PROCESS. A process means it’s ongoing. It doesn’t end until you do. It is never complete.

Life is always in a state of beautiful incompletion.

We are all works in progress. For the whole of our lives.

It is never “done”. It can never be done!

We will be learning and growing into an ever-expanded version of our best self, our whole life. It’s a glorious process of growth.

It’s about expansion and about improvement and inspiration.

It’s about reaching a little higher, being a little braver, asking for a little more. It’s not about fixing something that’s broken.

You are not broken and anyone who tells you you are is lying. Don’t believe them!

A New Year is simply a convenient time to dust off the cobwebs and assess where we are at with our life’s project.

Our work in progress. It’s just a milestone in the journey. A reminder to pause and reflect.

So, this year I am offering you some different kinds of New Year resolutions.

Ones that delight you rather than punish you.

Goals that draw you forward effortlessly in the energy of growth rather than beating you up in the energy of “not quite good enough”.

Principles that lift you up, rather than tear you down for not being smart, thin, fun, rich enough – or whatever.

Because you, you dear reader, are enough.

Make your resolutions something that makes your soul sing not fill you with an increasing creeping feeling of dread.

Resolve toward what makes you grow, not what you want to fix.

Resolve to laugh more in 2020
• Resolve to love more in 2020.
Resolve to smell the roses more in 2020.
• Resolve to connect more in 2020.
Resolve to speak kindly to yourself, with love and compassion, in 2020.
• Resolve to strive for progress not for perfection in 2020.
• Resolve to honour your body and soul in 2020.
• Resolve never to stop growing, learning and expanding in 2020.
Resolve to be all that you can be, the happiest version of yourself in 2020.

That’s what I wish for you. You are not broken. You never were.

Embrace the glorious mess of all that you are and the beauty this year is going to unfold at your feet.

Happy New Year.

Categories
Dream and Goals Happiness Live Happy Inspiration Positive Thought Strategy

Why you don’t need a ‘New You’

“Happy New Year! Happy New You!”

How many headlines will you see screaming that this month? Too many to count, I suspect.

I am going to be really subversive here (I know, I’m such a rebel) and kick off the first column of the New Year with a directly contradictory premise: You don’t need a “New You”.

The “You” you are is absolutely perfect in your imperfection. Anyone who tells you you are broken in some way is undermining your personal sovereignty. Especially anyone who tells you you are broken in order to sell something. You are not broken! You are whole and complete. Life and self-improvement is a PROCESS. A process means it’s ongoing. It doesn’t end until you do. It is never complete. Life is always in a state of beautiful incompletion.

We are all works in progress. For the whole of our lives. It is never “done”. It can never be done! We will be learning and growing into an ever-expanded version of our best self, our whole life. It’s a glorious process of growth. It’s about expansion and about improvement and inspiration. It’s about reaching a little higher, being a little braver, asking for a little more. It’s not about fixing something that’s broken.  You are not broken and anyone who tells you you are is lying. Don’t believe them.

A New Year is simply a convenient time to dust off the cobwebs and assess where we are at with our life’s project. Our work in progress. It’s just a milestone in the journey. A reminder to pause and reflect.

So, this year I am offering you some different kinds of New Year resolutions. Ones that delight you rather than punish you. Goals that draw you forward effortlessly in the energy of growth rather than beating you up in the energy of “not quite good enough”. Principles that lift you up, rather than tear you down for not being smart, thin, fun, rich enough – or whatever.

Because you, you dear reader, are enough. Make your resolutions something that make your soul sing, not fill you with an increasing creeping feeling of dread. Resolve toward what makes you grow, not what you want to fix.

  • Resolve to laugh more in 2019.
  • Resolve to love more in 2019.
  • Resolve to smell the roses more in 2019.
  • Resolve to connect more in 2019.
  • Resolve to speak kindly to yourself, with love and compassion, in 2019.
  • Resolve to strive for progress not for perfection in 2019.
  • Resolve to honour your body and soul in 2019.
  • Resolve never to stop growing, learning and expanding in 2019.
  • Resolve to be all that you can be, the happiest version of yourself in 2019.

That’s what I wish for you. You are not broken. You never were. Embrace the glorious mess of all that you are and the beauty this year is going to unfold at your feet.

Happy New Year!

Categories
High Energy Happiness Live Happy Inspiration

How To Be Successful At Anything

How does anyone get to be really good at anything?

Look at the people you admire in any given field. Not necessarily famous people, or award winners or whatever – just successful people. How do they get to be so successful? What’s the common theme that connects them? The winning golfer and the on-to-it Mum, the high flying exec and the leading lady?

It’s very simple.

They focus on Their Own Stuff.

Which bit of your life are you doing really well in? Guaranteed that’s the area where you are focussing hardest on Your Own Stuff. Happy marriage – bet you are focused on loving communication, and date nights or whatever works for you. Fit, strong body? Sure as eggs are eggs, you are focused on eating well most of the time, getting organised to put healthy meals together and make exercise a regular thing. Focused on Your Own Stuff. Beautiful, immaculate home? I guarantee you make time to organise the plumber to fix the leak pronto. You clean or get it cleaned regularly. You fix up little maintenance issues as they arise. All. Your. Own. Stuff.

Where things have gone off the rails a bit is we tend to spend too much time focused Not On Our Stuff. If the bod isn’t rocking, we are likely continually prioritising other people’s needs and wants before the desperate screams of our own body. If our business isn’t thriving in the way we know it could, we are likely spending too much time on Facebook looking at other businesses skiting about how marvellously they are doing and thinking how our marketing doesn’t live up to theirs. Not Our Stuff. Career not really flying like it should? Highly likely we have been too shy in stepping up or speaking up for fear of what others might think about us. Again: Not Our Stuff.

Our Stuff is what we can influence today. Our Stuff is figuring out the small teeny tiny actions and choices we can make each moment that bring a bit more ease, flow and joy into each moment. Our Stuff is speaking up for ourselves. Our Stuff is prioritising our time and choices. Our Stuff is knowing we are not responsible for other people’s reactions. Our Stuff is taking a chance on our dreams.

Getting more focused on your own stuff turns stuff around super quickly. Good questions to get refocused on Your Own Stuff are:

1. This thing that’s winding me up / stressing me out – is this in fact, really, My Stuff? Or not? If it’s not your stuff – put it down!
2. This thing that’s important to me that’s not going as well as I’d like – how can I focus on this more (or differently) in order to move it towards where I want it to go?
3. If I weren’t worried about what anyone else thought of me/this, what would I do?
4. Is there a “should” involved here? If there is it’s usually a big fat clue the issue in question is coming from someone else’s agenda, not yours. Not. Your. Stuff.

The basic maths of the equation means that there are only 24 hours in the day, 525 600 minutes in a year. You get to say what quality of energy you bring to each of them. The reality is when we have our focus split across too many things and too much stuff that isn’t ours, we don’t get the success we seek in the areas that are truly important to us.

Number one tip to be successful at anything?

Focus. On. Your. Own. Stuff.

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