Ladies, in the age of images perfect celebrities in our face at every turn, who hasn’t had the odd crisis of confidence? Feeling Beautiful is a significant part of a woman’s psyche in much the same way that the “provider” image is deeply ingrained in men. That may be changing slowly but it’s still incredibly prevalent.
We WANT (need?) to feel beautiful as a woman. And, yet, I see too many women whose poor body image is kicking their ass all over their life. Here are three things you need to know:
1. Feeling Beautiful is a decision you can make for yourself.
Yup. Feeling anything, anything, is something you create for yourself. It’s not something someone else “makes” you feel. It’s the product of what you think about something that has occurred or someone has said. It’s not what they said, it’s what YOU think and therefore feel about it.
Which is good news. Because that means you don’t need external validation. You can take that power right back and DECIDE you want to feel beautiful, and that, in fact you are.
Check out this quote from the uber-talented actress Gabourey Sidibe:
“People always ask me, ‘You have so much confidence. Where did that come from?’ It came from me. One day I decided that I was beautiful, and so I carried out my life as if I was a beautiful girl … It doesn’t have anything to do with how the world perceives you. What matters is what you see. Your body is your temple, it’s your home, and you must decorate it.”
Is she “classically” beautiful? No. I guess not. Does beauty radiate from her soul. You best your ass it does.
Read this out loud for me, right now, with a different emphasis on each word:
I can CHOOSE to feel beautiful.
I can choose to feel beautiful.
I can choose to FEEL beautiful.
It’s in your hands sugarplum. Those thoughts are in YOUR head. Those emotions live in YOUR body. You can choose to feel beautiful RIGHT NOW. No lip-gloss required.
2. Even Cameron Diaz does not look like Cameron Diaz.
True. I bet even Cameron Diaz WANTS to look like Cameron Diaz! Airbrushing is rife. Photoshop is everywhere. Even we can we can put the most flattering filters on our own instagram pix before sharing them with the world. That’s why the #nofilter hashtag trends so high.
Smoke and Mirrors.
Tricks of the light.
Kim Kardashian’s contouring makeup tricks – check them OUT! Instant cheekbones.
Seriously. Don’t get taken off track by smoke and mirrors.
No-one looks like what they look like.
And that’s totally okay.
Don’t let an artificial idea of beauty throw your inner peace under the bus.
3. Beauty is an inside job.
Have you heard that catchy song out at the moment, by a band called G.L.R? It’s called Ugly Heart. I am sure you are also doing a bit of what I fondly call Car Dancing to it
The lyrics pull you in. Why? Because we all know traditional beauty on the outside does not equal beauty on the inside.
“Ok you’re pretty, your face is a work of art
Your smile could light up New York City after dark,
Ok you’re cover boy pretty stamped with a beauty mark,
But it’s such a pity, a boy so pretty
Has an ugly heart”
People lie. People cheat. People do some fairly shitty things. It’s a fact. Our thoughts and intentions and choices – they are all energy. We can radiate either a beautiful or an ugly energy. That’s what we really see and pick up on. Beauty really is an inside job.
It starts from the inside.
True beauty comes from truth.
It comes from integrity.
It comes from compassion.
It comes from kindness.
It comes from love.
Feel beautiful emotions. Act in beautiful ways. We live in a beautiful world. Feel that beauty. It will radiate.
Roald Dahl said it best:
“If a person has ugly thoughts, it begins to show on the face. And when that person has ugly thoughts every day, every week, every year, the face gets uglier and uglier until you can hardly bear to look at it.
A person who has good thoughts cannot ever be ugly. You can have a wonky nose and a crooked mouth and a double chin and stick-out teeth, but if you have good thoughts it will shine out of your face like sunbeams and you will always look lovely.”
Let the goodness shine out like sunbeams sweetheart.
You are ALREADY beautiful.