Be. Kind. To. Your. Mind.

Find something that works for YOU to switch it off.

Might be baking

Might be running

Might be one of those meditation colouring books (so not just for kids!) (that’s why I include a new design each month in the Coaching Academy!).

For me, nothing breaks the chatter in my head like smacking the boxing bag. Real hard! Everything else just melts away. 

Whatever your thing is, engage in it with enthusiasm and consistency and (crucially!) without guilt.

The post Be kind to your mind 🧡 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

What to do, what to do? 

There are TWO important strategies for you to get unstuck: 

1. Create increased MOMENTUM in an area of life that is going WELL, where there is NO confusion. Take a step forwards or up or just any kind of simple positive action to AMP UP what is going WELL. Make what is going well go even BETTER. 

Why does this work to get you unstuck on the OTHER thing? 

By UPPING your focus in a positive direction you naturally REDUCE it on what is negative. This can unlock what is not going so well as you have stopped trying to FORCE a solution to something you haven’t been able to solve. You get in the groove of what’s going WELL and that positive energy creates a ripple effect that helps the OTHER thing start to solve not you are not poking at it the whole time. 

2. Take ONE SMALL STEP towards resolving THE THING that is stuck. You don’t need to see HOW THE WHOLE THING will solve or work out or fix itself. You don’t need to see 3 years down the track and how it will all unfold. Just take one small step, one tiny action on it, that feels even just slightly like relief or lightness. Just take a TINY STEP. Don’t think its pointless because it’s small, do it anyway. 

Why does THIS work to get you unstuck? 

Firstly because you will feel a tiny bit of relief from your tiny step, and relief is always good. Secondly, and more importantly, you will gain a NEW PERSPECTIVE from the place just one tiny step further on that you may not have seen. Think of it like a fiendishly hard 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle. Putting in ONE puzzle piece doesn’t seem like its really doing anything, drop in the ocean when there are still 946 still to place, BUT, that one clicking into place makes just one of the others make a bit more sense, you can see just a hint more of a pattern than you could before which unlocks the next tiny step and tiny piece of the puzzle. Each piece CHANGES THE PERSPECTIVE AVAILABLE to you of the NEXT one. You don’t NEED to see the whole thing to take the next small step, you trust that one will start to REVEAL the other.

(Image credit: wonder_doodles)

___________________________________________________________

While you’re here I have a question for you.

Does overthinking keep you awake at night?

Does this lady provide an accurate representation of how you often feel?!

If so, I would love to help you.

Join me in July 2024 for

The 30-Day Shrinking Overthinking Bootcamp

Stop negative spirals and make your mind a nicer place to live in 30 days.

Join me in July 2024 to learn 6 powerful techniques to manage your mind and reduce anxiety.

As someone who overcame extreme burnout, I’ve helped thousands of women stop overthinking.

Now, I am looking for 50 women who want to learn how to reduce stressful loops of overthinking, stop negative spirals, declutter their mind and feel more in control, to join me for this 30-day challenge inside my Coaching Academy, from 1st July 2024.

It’s £39/month | Risk free | 30-Day Guarantee | Cancel any time!

Click here to learn more.

The post What to do when you don’t know what to do appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

When a whole new decade is bearing down on us we seem far more likely to ask ourselves if our life is all that it “should be” by this stage. Are we hitting the milestones we had always privately set for ourselves at this marker? Life can be thrown into sharp relief by contemporaries around us ticking past the same clock and the same milestones.

A change of decade can be the most incredible kick up the pahootie to refocus and get serious about what we want to achieve in the next decade, harnessing that natural motivation can be all powerful. But I also see it as a time where more regret will also surface as a result of the reflection. 

Of milestones not met or exceeded, statuses not reached. 

The trick here is not to get sucked into a whirlpool of regret, but to take any relevant lessons and use them to push forwards once again. 

To not look sorrowfully at the time that has been “lost” but focus all that is to come. To take it as a clean fresh page and begin again. Start anew. Double down. Make it happen. 

The quote attributed to C. S. Lewis says it best “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending”. 

We have the power to write ourselves a new ending any time we choose. We can do it whenever we take the time to reflect and refocus: not just when the year reads “9”, or a day of the week starts with an M. That no matter what is past, we get to say how our story will end. Starting now.  You can write yourself a new ending, starting today. 

The post Write yourself a new ending 💞 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

It’s this one:

It’s a Chinese proverb which says “The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now.” 

So good, yes? 

When was the best time to take up yoga, and keep up your practice every day? Well, twenty tears go, but the second best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to have started that amazing skin care routine? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to have started saving extra for retirement? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to stop eating sugar/start doing 10000 steps a day? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

You get it. 

Anything seriously life-enhancing benefits from longevity and the benefit of compounding returns. From it becoming so routine and such a habit it just becomes our natural baseline of how we take care of ourselves. 

The same goes for taking care of our mental and emotional health. 

“The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now.”

The post The quote on my wall… 🌳🌳 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

“Well…it’s not brave”, Anna slurped thoughtfully through her smoothie. “You don’t need to be brave…if you decide not to be scared.”

Well BOOM, little girl. Good one. That is indeed true. You don’t need to be brave if you decide not to be scared. If you decide something is not inherently scary then no courage or bravery is required. You just do it. Maybe even relish and enjoy it.  You‘ve gotta love the irrefutable logic that comes out of the mouths of babes.

It’s a fabulous lesson to ponder, is it not?

How we define a situation dictates what we need to bring to it.

If we define a situation as boring, then we are going to need to bring persistence.

If we define a situation as hard, then we are required to pack our willpower.

If we define someone or something as scary, we need to muster our courage.

It gave me pause for thought and I hope it does for you today. I had a piece of Boomerang Admin I had been putting off (Boomerang Admin, you know the sort, you think you have sorted it, it’s DONE, you have thrown the task away forever but it keeps coming back. Form tick box is not ticked right. Payment has not gone through. Query on fulfilment. Code not selected. Yada Yada Yada. Boomerang Admin.) I’d filed this task mentally under the helpful category of TEDIOUS RED TAPE I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WASTE MY TIME ON REPEATEDLY. It was requiring every drop of willpower, persistence and tenacity I could possibly marshal to overcome the overwhelming inertia to actually get it fixed.

Realising that if I stopped defining it as tedious I wouldn’t need to bring any of my willpower reserves was a game-changer. If I decide not to be bored then I don’t need to force myself to pay attention. Redefining the situation from tedious to an opportunity to get clarity and completion meant no persistence needed. Plus, I have to say I got it done in about a tenth of the time I thought I would.

We tend to have well-ingrained habits of definition around certain situations in our life.  Have a think. There is bound to be something or someone who is scaring or boring the pants off you, requiring you to bring your willpower or bring your brave.

Have a look if a change of definition might help you; because you don’t need to be brave, if you decide not to be scared.

The post Bring your BRAVE 💪 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

​​Your brain defaults to seeing “The Gap” of where you want to be…the chores undone, the emails not replied to, the yoga class not made, the story not read, the kitchen bench not decluttered…you know, The Gap between YOU and Superwoman who is “on top of everything”.

This default perspective is unhelpful. Makes us feel bad. We need to consciously direct our brain to “The Gain” instead. The sore knee kissed better. The midday meeting that got an outcome. The lunch boxes were packed. The kindly Good Morning to the elderly neighbour. The bins put out. The swift lunchtime walk. The dentist appointment booked. The twenty six emails that DID get replied to.

Look. Life is LIFE. It will NEVER be complete til we are

There will ALWAYS be stuff that’s UNDONE.

You can’t use DONE-NESS as your measure of how good your day was.

Train your brain to see not The Gap, but The Gain.

I promise you: you are doing better than you are judging yourself for. 

Remove the unattainable yardstick of “done”, you will never reach it anyway.

Redirect your attention, and your COMPASSION to give your sweet self a break: I promise you, you are doing better than you think you are. 

The post You are doing better than you think 💞 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

Have you noticed how much (especially as women) we tend to over-apologise and say sorry when it’s not actually required?! It’s a weird habit, and one worth revising. Things I am no longer apologising for:

Not always being available (time, attention and energy are limited, it’s not personal, it’s just freaking MATHS)

Prioritising the things that matter (to ME)

Not giving an answer right away (it’s ok to think about it)

  Working at the pace that’s right for me on voluntary projects (it needs to fit in with my life, not the other way round!)

When it’s not actually MY FAULT there is an issue! (why the hell am I saying sorry – YOU say sorry!)

Forget the bubble bath. This. Is. Real. Self. Care.

The post STOP apologising! appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

“You are fearless” said the email “fearless! The way you put yourself out there. I couldn’t do that”.

Thank you, I said, but please don’t mistake my work rate for an absence of fear! 

I love the perception of being fearless – but it’s far from the truth. 

The truth is this:

The first time I did live TV I was terrified. Terr. I. Fied.

The second time I was still terrified.

The third time, I was terrified minus one percentage point.

Out of about a thousand.

When my book got published by Penguin and went “out there” into the world I was elated, excited but more than a little scared of what the reception might be to such a controversial wellness topic delivered in a pretty bullish style.

Each week when I pressed send on my column for The New Zealand Herald, knowing it will be read by tens of thousands – sometimes there is a little prickle of worry about how it might go down.

So, I’m absolutely not fearless despite how it may look! 

Here’s how it works for me:

I have fear. Of course I do.

But I also have a message to share, and my message is bigger than my fear.

It has to be.

My fear of not doing what I am meant to do

My fear of not serving the world in the way I know I am here for

Is bigger than my fear of failing

Is bigger than my fear of looking stupid.

My message of self-empowerment around women’s mental, emotional, physical and spiritual wellbeing 

Is bigger than my fear of falling

Is bigger than my fear of not being perfect

I know I cannot really fail because even if I help one woman live bigger, reach higher, expand into the woman she is meant to be with the life and PEACE (of heart and mind) she deserves – I have done my job.

I know nothing is ever completely perfect. And I certainly am not!

So, I will keep taking perfectly imperfect action forwards.

Being fearless does not mean having no fear.

Being fearless means believing in something bigger than your fear.

So, that thing you are scared of? Can you believe in the having of it more than your fear? If we wait to be “not scared” to do something….we can wait (and waste) a lifetime. Choose that your conviction is bigger than your fear.

The post The truth about being FEARLESS 💪 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

So, we wait for things to magically change themselves, which most of the time, they just don’t.

Avoidance of the temporary scared feeling can lead us to choose to stay stuck with the status quo for weeks, years, decades sometimes.

Thing is, feeling stuck is a very uncomfortable emotion to live with too.

So, in essence we are swapping experiencing one uncomfortable emotional state (fear) for another one (stuckness) rather than avoiding it all together.

Allowing ourselves to experience the temporary emotion of nerves, scariness, fear – is PART of creating positive change. It doesn’t last forever, but it is often an integral part of the ride.

The more we can accept it, welcome it even, the faster we can unstick ourselves and include more of what our heart desires in our life.

What’s more scary? Experiencing fear on the way to what you want, or, living in a state of stuck status quo long term? I know you know the answer.

The post Do you want things to change in your life? appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

Just because other people can’t see it or applaud yet, IT DOESN’T MEAN IT’S NOT HAPPENING!

Success is not always what you can see.

Just because it’s not on Facebook or Instagram doesn’t mean that quiet, steady acts of brilliance and commitment are not happening quietly and powerfully every minute of the day.

Saluting all you quiet achievers.

Keep up that amazing work.

The post Success Is Not Always What You See appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.