You will be spending too much of your EMOTIONAL AND MENTAL ENERGY ON THINGS THAT ARE OUTSIDE YOUR CONTROL.

We all do this. I do this. I find I am in a right old frazzle and then stop to see what it is I am feeling so overwhelmed about and sure enough…it will be something outside my DIRECT control. Der Louise! That’s basic, but SO easy to slip up on!

Checking in on this cuts through the overwhelm instantly as it allows us to self-direct our mental and emotional energy to the place where it has the most impact. Overwhelm dissipates pretty much immediately.

Here’s a handy graphic and a list below for you

So, if you are feeling overwhelmed check in and see if your attention is one (or more) of these…

Out Of My Control…

• What other people believe, think, say, or post online
• What other people choose to do, including their behaviour, decisions, priorities, and boundaries
• Other people’s feelings, including how they feel about me (yup, sorry!)
• Other people’s opinions or worries
• Other people’s time
• Outcomes (as opposed to my effort)
• Timing of external events
• Random events or luck
• The past
• Global news
• Market conditions or economic shifts
• Cultural norms or societal expectations
• How quickly others change or grow
• External opportunities appearing or not appearing
• Illness or unexpected health events
• Aging
• Time
• Tax
• Traffic
• The weather

Hmmm…quite the list huh? There is A LOT that we do not control, my friend. Like A LOT. When we focus on it, and how it coulda/woulda/shoulda be different it is a fast track to feeling overwhelmed. We want things to be different, but we have no control in them being different, equals overwhelm. It’s a real waste of our mental and emotional energy.

So, here is where should we redirect ourselves to:

In My Control…

• What I say, including my words and tone
• What I think – full control over my own brain!
• What I do, including my actions and responses, priorities and focus
• My opinions about myself and others
• How I interpret situations and the meaning I give events
• My effort and consistency
• The standards I set for myself
• Whether I follow through on commitments
• How I spend my time and attention
• What I look at online and choose to put into my mind
• My self-care choices and how I choose to take care of my body
• What I consume (food, media, information, influences)
• My habits and routines
• Who I hang out with
• The boundaries I voice
• The questions I ask myself
• Whether I ask for help or support
• When I choose to persist or pivot

Notice how you feel, when you read the first list, as compared to when you read the second list…quite different, yes?

Whenever you feel overwhelmed (and this is life in 2026, that is inevitable) the key is to see WHY you are overwhelmed, track it back to the first list. Accept that it is out of your control and then take your attention – and therefore your MOOD – where it matters, back to your own sphere of control. Your power and your positivity lie right there, and are available anytime.

I hope this helps

P.S, If you’d like to know more about my Academy, click here

The post Overwhelm: the list you need to change the pattern appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

Broadly speaking, the left hemisphere of our brain is where our rational logical mind lives, and our right hemisphere is home to our sense of peace and creativity. At work, we can tend to get stuck in left brain dominance, very task focused and logical: all good things. However, if you want to find a little moment of peace in your day, take 60 seconds to consciously activate more of your right brain. Simply use a few rounds of the Alternate Nostril Breathing that we start class with, OR, you can simply close your mouth AND your RIGHT nostril and breath in and out 10 breaths just through the LEFT nostril SLOWLY to energise the right brain. Take 60 seconds to do this before a meeting and notice how much more calm and focused you are. Spooky.

#2. Relax the face

So much tension can build up in the face, we are sending stress messages to our body just from the determined set of our jaw and our wrinkled brow. Try this great yoga asana ‘Lion’ to release the tension from your face and to send relaxation throughout your body.

You will need to work in an office where you can close the door for this one, or pop to the bathroom to try it unless you have very  incurious colleagues in your open-plan office!

So, sit quietly, put your hands in your lap, then scrunch your face up, tight tight tight, scrunch the forehead, wrinkle the nose, grit the teeth: make a real scrunched old prune face…then…big exhale…do the lion face: open your mouth WIDE and stretch your tongue out, curling its tip down toward the chin, open your eyes wide, contract the muscles on the front of your throat, and exhale the breath slowly out through your mouth with a big “ha” sound. Then just check in with how you are feeling. Better, huh? I know, you don’t realise just how much tension you are holding in your face until you release it. Nice.

#3. Relax the mind

If  you are getting super stressed by a particular task or person ask yourself: how much will this thing, or this person’s opinion of this thing, matter to me 5 years from now? 99% of the time the answer is ‘hmmmm, not so much actually’ and simply, asking the question is accompanied by a release of mental tension. So, just realigning your long-term perspective with this simple question can take much of the emotion and the frustration out of the task or the interaction and make it much simpler to complete. All it takes is 60 seconds to press pause and your body and mind will thank you for it.

The post De-stressing at Work in 60 Seconds 🧘‍♀️ appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

Be. Kind. To. Your. Mind.

Find something that works for YOU to switch it off.

Might be baking

Might be running

Might be one of those meditation colouring books (so not just for kids!) (that’s why I include a new design each month in the Coaching Academy!).

For me, nothing breaks the chatter in my head like smacking the boxing bag. Real hard! Everything else just melts away. 

Whatever your thing is, engage in it with enthusiasm and consistency and (crucially!) without guilt.

The post Be kind to your mind 🧡 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

What to do, what to do? 

There are TWO important strategies for you to get unstuck: 

1. Create increased MOMENTUM in an area of life that is going WELL, where there is NO confusion. Take a step forwards or up or just any kind of simple positive action to AMP UP what is going WELL. Make what is going well go even BETTER. 

Why does this work to get you unstuck on the OTHER thing? 

By UPPING your focus in a positive direction you naturally REDUCE it on what is negative. This can unlock what is not going so well as you have stopped trying to FORCE a solution to something you haven’t been able to solve. You get in the groove of what’s going WELL and that positive energy creates a ripple effect that helps the OTHER thing start to solve not you are not poking at it the whole time. 

2. Take ONE SMALL STEP towards resolving THE THING that is stuck. You don’t need to see HOW THE WHOLE THING will solve or work out or fix itself. You don’t need to see 3 years down the track and how it will all unfold. Just take one small step, one tiny action on it, that feels even just slightly like relief or lightness. Just take a TINY STEP. Don’t think its pointless because it’s small, do it anyway. 

Why does THIS work to get you unstuck? 

Firstly because you will feel a tiny bit of relief from your tiny step, and relief is always good. Secondly, and more importantly, you will gain a NEW PERSPECTIVE from the place just one tiny step further on that you may not have seen. Think of it like a fiendishly hard 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle. Putting in ONE puzzle piece doesn’t seem like its really doing anything, drop in the ocean when there are still 946 still to place, BUT, that one clicking into place makes just one of the others make a bit more sense, you can see just a hint more of a pattern than you could before which unlocks the next tiny step and tiny piece of the puzzle. Each piece CHANGES THE PERSPECTIVE AVAILABLE to you of the NEXT one. You don’t NEED to see the whole thing to take the next small step, you trust that one will start to REVEAL the other.

(Image credit: wonder_doodles)

___________________________________________________________

While you’re here I have a question for you.

Does overthinking keep you awake at night?

Does this lady provide an accurate representation of how you often feel?!

If so, I would love to help you.

Join me in July 2024 for

The 30-Day Shrinking Overthinking Bootcamp

Stop negative spirals and make your mind a nicer place to live in 30 days.

Join me in July 2024 to learn 6 powerful techniques to manage your mind and reduce anxiety.

As someone who overcame extreme burnout, I’ve helped thousands of women stop overthinking.

Now, I am looking for 50 women who want to learn how to reduce stressful loops of overthinking, stop negative spirals, declutter their mind and feel more in control, to join me for this 30-day challenge inside my Coaching Academy, from 1st July 2024.

It’s £39/month | Risk free | 30-Day Guarantee | Cancel any time!

Click here to learn more.

The post What to do when you don’t know what to do appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

I think we are a lot more aware these days that Mother’s Day does not look like breakfast in bed on a tray with a hand-drawn card and loving partner supervising, like it does in the movies. Life in 2024 is much more aware and compassionate (thank goodness!), but days like this can still sting.

This sting is a natural response to complexity around this primary human relationship; whatever you feel is valid and important to acknowledge, even if that is just a moment of quiet honesty with yourself

Image credit: Bless the Messy

The post The joy and complexity of Mother’s Day 💐 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

If you are anything like me I expect you do a bit each day…put this and that away, unload the dishwasher, wipe the surfaces, pick up that towel (that only I seem able to see ) and so on…

Why? Well again, same as me I guess you do a little bit of a tidy up each day for the same reasons:

If you leave it more than a few days it’s just so much harder to sort out, mess seems to breed mess!

I can’t RELAX in a messy space, I don’t work well, but I also don’t relax well either

  I just feel better if I keep on top if things

Same, yes?

So, that’s what we all do to keep on top of our living space, to ensure it’s a clean and tidy place to live, rest and work. Somewhere we enjoy spending time. Enjoy connecting. Enjoy hanging out. 

Now then {first_name}, what if I asked you the same about your INTERNAL SPACE? Your brain and mind .

How do you tidy THAT each day? 

How do you ensure that you do a little and often to keep your internal space (your mental health) clean and ordered so it’s a space where you are happy hanging out and spending time? How do you clear up so small issues don’t become big ones because they have been left ignored in a pile or swept under the carpet? Do you feel relaxed and connected in your own mind?

Much tricker question, yes? 

We are so much better at prioritising our EXTERNAL living space, to our INTERNAL living space, and yes…and yet…the one that has the biggest impact on our mental health? INSIDE OUR OWN HEADS! Remember, we take that space everywhere with us! It’s at home, at work, in the car, at the airport, at the dentist’s office, at the concert, in the supermarket…we are IN that space every waking moment of every single day. It’s actually our MOST IMPORTANT SPACE. 

Given that’s the space we actually spend the most time in – how do we make sure we keep that clean and clear and that it’s a nice place to be?

___________________________________________________________

While you’re here I have a question for you.

Does overthinking keep you awake at night?

Does this lady provide an accurate representation of how you often feel?!

If so, I would love to help you.

Join me in July 2024 for

The 30-Day Shrinking Overthinking Bootcamp

Stop negative spirals and make your mind a nicer place to live in 30 days.

Join me in July 2024 to learn 6 powerful techniques to manage your mind and reduce anxiety.

As someone who overcame extreme burnout, I’ve helped thousands of women stop overthinking.

Now, I am looking for 50 women who want to learn how to reduce stressful loops of overthinking, stop negative spirals, declutter their mind and feel more in control, to join me for this 30-day challenge inside my Coaching Academy, from 1st July 2024.

It’s £39 | Risk free | 30-Day Guarantee | Cancel any time!

Click here to learn more.

The post How often do you tidy the house? 🏡 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

When a whole new decade is bearing down on us we seem far more likely to ask ourselves if our life is all that it “should be” by this stage. Are we hitting the milestones we had always privately set for ourselves at this marker? Life can be thrown into sharp relief by contemporaries around us ticking past the same clock and the same milestones.

A change of decade can be the most incredible kick up the pahootie to refocus and get serious about what we want to achieve in the next decade, harnessing that natural motivation can be all powerful. But I also see it as a time where more regret will also surface as a result of the reflection. 

Of milestones not met or exceeded, statuses not reached. 

The trick here is not to get sucked into a whirlpool of regret, but to take any relevant lessons and use them to push forwards once again. 

To not look sorrowfully at the time that has been “lost” but focus all that is to come. To take it as a clean fresh page and begin again. Start anew. Double down. Make it happen. 

The quote attributed to C. S. Lewis says it best “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending”. 

We have the power to write ourselves a new ending any time we choose. We can do it whenever we take the time to reflect and refocus: not just when the year reads “9”, or a day of the week starts with an M. That no matter what is past, we get to say how our story will end. Starting now.  You can write yourself a new ending, starting today. 

The post Write yourself a new ending 💞 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

It’s this one:

It’s a Chinese proverb which says “The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now.” 

So good, yes? 

When was the best time to take up yoga, and keep up your practice every day? Well, twenty tears go, but the second best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to have started that amazing skin care routine? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to have started saving extra for retirement? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

When was the best time for you to stop eating sugar/start doing 10000 steps a day? Well, twenty tears go, but the second-best time is NOW. 

You get it. 

Anything seriously life-enhancing benefits from longevity and the benefit of compounding returns. From it becoming so routine and such a habit it just becomes our natural baseline of how we take care of ourselves. 

The same goes for taking care of our mental and emotional health. 

“The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now.”

The post The quote on my wall… 🌳🌳 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

As humans, we habitually

a) OVERestimate what we can do in a DAY

and

b) UNDERestimate what we can accomplish in a YEAR

For a QUICK SNAPSHOT of where you will be a YEAR from now, look at your habits TODAY:

Do you have a habit of being busy all the time just racing from one thing to the next?

Do you have a habit of people pleasing and putting your own needs to the back of the queue?

Do you have a habit of starting a healthy habit but very quickly falling off the wagon?

Do you think you’ll sort these things “when there is time”?

That time pretty much never comes

Genuine change is building tiny habits IN THE NOW:

A daily mental health practice that keeps you up and moving forwards.

Purposefully your body daily in some way daily, no matter what.

Being aware of your true priorities for the YEAR and allocation your time, energy and attention in line with that in the moment.

These are all things that are built into my Coaching Academy Wellbeing Warriors* – all you need to do is show up and be amazed at what you can accomplish in a year.  

If you don’t have a structure and a system for making good choices easier and supported for yourself then either join one or create one for yourself. If you want to know how your life will look a year from now…you can find the answer in your tiny choices today

The post Stop waiting to change 💗 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.

How about we stop waiting for summer? For the kids to be older. Until we drop the last 5kg. For Friday. For the weekend. Until the exams are over. The reno is done. The mortgage is paid off. The house is bought. The deposit is saved. Until she behaves herself. Until the flights are booked. The work is done. The boss says yes. The campaign is over. The treatment is complete. The project starts. The term finishes. Until we have some space. Until we have some time. Until they sleep through the night. Until he/she says yes. Until we can afford it.

How about we stop with the waiting? If we are not mindful, happiness can be deferred for so many good, and not so good, reasons. Daily life can become a mental ticker tape of things to get done, and days to be got through, before the big ticket milestones fall into place. We can become so focused on the future that we forget to connect to the tiny moments of joy that are inherent in the now.

It is a great truth that, as much as there is always something to appreciate in the worst of times (if we dig really deep, it will be there), conversely, there is always something to complain about in the best of times, if that is where our focus goes.

It’s up to each of us to figure out which way we want to habitually look at the world.

Choosing to stop waiting to be happy can be one of the most powerful choices we can ever make. We can miss so many everyday moments of happiness accessible right now, this minute, when we are in wait mode for the significant jigsaw pieces of life to fall into place.

We can choose to be happy now when we breathe in the aroma of our fresh cuppa. When a small hand slips into ours at pick-up. That we have people to share a meal with at the end of the day. For the nourishing food on our plate. That we have incredible gadgets to clean our home that prior generations spent their whole day doing manually (my granny had a mangle in the outhouse for goodness’ sake!). That we just messaged a friend 12,000 miles away on the other side of the world in three seconds on our phone. That our sheets smell clean and fresh. That we breathe such clean green air and don’t even think about it. That our body is walking, talking and seeing effortlessly. The sunshine on our skin. The breeze in our hair. The smile of a stranger. The unbridled glee of a child at something so small. The dog was so happy to see us home.

When we are waiting for the big jigsaw pieces to fall into place and rushing to the next thing, we can chronically overlook the tiny moments of joy that are only accessible now, now, now. It’s the little moments that light life up.

Look up people, look up. Happiness is right now.

The post Are you missing these tiny moments of joy? 😍 appeared first on Louise Thompson, Life Coach, Wellbeing Writer and Speaker.