Not investing in my wellbeing cost me over $100k…

I want to explore why someone wouldn’t invest in their mental health and physical wellbeing. It’s usually one of these three things… “It will just take care of itself  and doesn’t need proactive support” (weirdly, this is how 95% of the population expect their mental health to work, to just “just be okay” or “fix itself” or “look after itself”). “I will get to it later… I’m super busy right now…” “I can’t afford it” (she says on a phone priced over a thousand dollars, in three hundred dollar shoes) Let’s take each of these three in turn:  Mental Health Our mental health does not exist in a vacuum. We don’t get taught skills to proactively manage our mental health and mood at school. The quality of our LIFE is determined by the quality of our mental health. Why do we place SO little value on proactively supporting it and expect it to happen magically all by itself?  The fact is, it doesn’t, does it?! That’s why we are a nation of people self-medicating with wine o’clock, cheese and crackers, endless scrolling, avoiding hard conversation and potential conflict, being riddled with resentment and still not speaking up, cake, gossip, pushing down emotions and pretending we are fine…and on and on and on.  Mental Health doesn’t take care of itself. It takes effort and structure. We all know this. The quality of our LIFE is determined by the quality of our mental health. It’s time to invest in that. You can do it with me in a super cost-effective and pleasurable… Read more

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Why the cost of the Coaching Academy is going up in August

Earlier this week, I announced I’m significantly increasing the price of Wellbeing Warriors Coaching Academy after July 2022. It’s been amazing getting so much feedback saying I should have done this years ago, and with the value you get in the Academy, it is still undercharging! Today I want to explain to you why it’s important that I make this change, and make it now.  We launched the Academy in 2015 (2015!) and made a commitment to each and every one of you that you would remain grandfathered at the rate you joined at, no matter the market rate. I believe so much in every woman having access to effective mental health and physical health support that I wanted to make the highest quality coaching service available at prices accessible to as many women as possible.  (Just as a side note, my 1-2-1 services start at $5,000 and have a year’s waitlist. I wanted to offer effective coaching that was available instantly and for those who can’t afford the bespoke approach. In that context, a YEAR in the Academy for just $379 is an unbelievable steal.) The last price increase was many years ago, and I absolutely honour every single grandfathered member rate, and look after those loyal members so well! Here’s the thing though… in the last 7 years… you know this, I have held the PRICE, but I cannot hold the COST. In that time, the following costs have increased, and to a point where they can no longer be absorbed or subsidised: Support elves (they don’t get… Read more

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How this busy Mum ditched the sugar and the drama… and GREW in confidence!

I want to share a story to illustrate how most women are sabotaging themselves with their approach to wellbeing. Basically, creating the (super demoralising) boom-bust cycle of on and off the wagon with themselves, costing not just their progress but their sanity too! Hopefully, this story will stop some people from doing the same! Because the question I really want you to keep in mind as you read this is… “What would it be like if I stopped starting over?” So, the heroine of today’s story is Marina. Marina is a fabulous member in Wellbeing Warriors. And it took Marina a looooong time to become a member! I’m going to illustrate Marina’s journey for you so you “get it.” Check out the image below 👇 It represents Marina’s progress with the healthy habits she REALLY wanted to establish that would enhance her life the most… basically these were ditching sugar (and a few kilos whilst she was at it!), reducing alcohol, exercising 3x a week, and not losing her sh*t with her teenage sons on the regular. Learning how to meditate and reduce stress would also be a bonus, because work was high pressure.  These didn’t seem like too much to ask from life, but as a busy working Mum it seemed to be an impossible task to keep all the plates spinning at the same time.  If she ditched sugar she would get grumpy and be more irritable with the kids after a long day.  If the weight started to come off, that would feel GREAT SUPER AMAZING for… Read more

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Breaking through from burnout: When “I’m fine” is really a secret cry for help

Prisha is a busy mum and step-mum, who works part-time AND is an exceptional surveyor in the office. She juggles a lot, mostly with a smile, and is THAT FRIEND. You know, the one you go to who always helps you feel better and knows what to say.  Prisha had a problem and that was – she was veeeerrry burned out. And that a lot of her “I’m fine!”’s were in fact covering up the fact she was utterly overwhelmed and feeling like she was a hamster on a wheel from the moment she woke up to the moment she closed her eyes at night.  AND because she was already so busy, she absolutely did NOT have time for yet another spendy wellbeing programme or gym membership that would be gathering dust after the first week. She didn’t need more in her life, she was already up to her limit.  Prisha joined the Coaching Academy as a bit of a cry for help, really. And she spent the first few weeks just checking in with the daily challenges, as she dipped into the Packing Light module that helped her dial down her tendency to overthink.  Her big breakthrough came in one of the weekly Coach Spot LIVE sessions. It was a question another Academy member had asked about overwhelm in terms of extended family obligations, and as she listened to the advice and tools given on the live Prisha picked up a HUGE ‘AHA!’ moment for herself that changed the way she had been viewing her responsibilities and her boundaries. … Read more

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Getting other people to make change

Something that comes up ALL THE TIME in my coaching sessions today, thoughts on how life would be A LOT easier if….etc… Life would be a LOT easier if only other people (boss/partner/sister/ex) changed what they were doing/saying so it suited us better or was (what we perceived to be) better for them.  If other people were more reliable/fun/on to it/organised/truthful/adult/well intentioned/thoughtful, our lives (and potentially theirs) would be SO MUCH EASIER! However…. Giving up the illusion that other people could/should/will change to suit us is a huge personal growth milestone.    People will never change unless THEY want to.  Even then it might not be consistent or lasting.  People will not change unless they want to and are READY to.   You can try and cajole, beg, guilt, shame, plead…use logic, use emotion, but until it’s what they want and are ready for it’s not going to happen. It will be their timetable, not yours. They will be ready when they are ready. (Which might be NEVER)    Change is hard – it requires choice and commitment.  Parking the need for others to be different in order for us to be happy is HUGE  It allows us to put that wasted energy where it can make a genuine difference   The ONLY place we can truly effect change Changing ourselves    P.S. Ready to make some first steps towards supported change where you can make change the most easily? Well then, I have your back! Here are three ways to work with me: Book: Start using the 16 easy-to-implement mental… Read more

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Healing from what hurt you is NOT linear…

Today I want to talk about what happens when we are hurt…and the hurt goes on for a long time. When we (and those around us) wonder how, or indeed, if we will ever move on from it. It often takes the form of the question “Why aren’t you over it yet?” Far more likely this is the voice in your own head, rather than the unkind words of someone else. They still hurt though. When we are in pain we just want to be on the other side of it. To have “moved on”. To have successfully “put it behind us”. Be like it never happened. Be the person we were before what happened to us happened to us. Thing is, it pretty much never works like that. After a grief or trauma we don’t really get the luxury of totally moving on. Somethings we will always carry, however much we would rather not! They will be forever a part of our personal history. Instead if we manage our expectations that we will be changed, but know that we have the capacity to grow around it, make space for it, and show up as a new expanded version of ourselves. That we can, and will, be happy again. That this healing is a process that happens in fits and starts rather than a straight line. Some days we make a great leap forwards. Other days just getting through the damn day is an achievement in itself. Healing is a winding path away from what hurt us. It’s not linear…. Read more

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What I love about my job the MOST?

I wanted to talk abut this beautiful truth: YOU ARE THE GREATEST PROJECT YOU WILL EVER WORK ON. It’s a beautiful truth to consider, and when I think about What I love about my job the MOST? (It’s hard to pick because there are a lot of things ) … so the best thing for me is that I get to share my FASCINATION with personal growth and how our minds work with other like-minded souls in a way that makes that KNOWLEDGE live, breath and create results and REAL CHANGE.  We are all a Work In Progress We all have new insights to discover about ourselves that unlock peace and progress We are never done! There is always something new to learn about ourselves. There is ALWAYS a new level! How cool is THAT?!    The JOY I get from seeing my Academy members and clients unlock those aha moments, or make those difficult decisions that will set them free is immense. Life is LONG (if we are lucky) We are meant to keep LEARNING along the path.  YOU are the greatest project you will EVER work on.

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We are talking about TIME and the IMPACT on your mental health

What are we talking about today? TIME…we are talking about time and the impact on our mental health:  As humans, we habitually a) OVERestimate what we can do in a DAY and b) UNDERestimate what we can accomplish in a YEAR  For a QUICK SNAPSHOT of where you will be a YEAR from now, look at your habits TODAY:  Do you have a habit of being busy all the time just racing from one thing to the next? Do you have a habit of people pleasing and putting your own needs to the back of the queue? Do you have a habit of starting a healthy habit but very quickly falling off the wagon? Do you think you’ll sort these things “when there is time”? That time pretty much never comes Genuine change is building tiny habits IN THE NOW:  A daily mental health practice that keeps you up and moving forwards.  Purposefully your body daily in some way daily, no matter what.  Being aware of your true priorities for the YEAR and allocation your time, energy and attention in line with that in the moment. These are all things that are built into my Coaching Academy Wellbeing Warriors – all you need to do it show up and be amazed at what you can accomplish in a year.  If you don’t have a structure and a system for making good choices easier and supported for yourself then either join one or create one for yourself. If you want to know how your life will look a year from now…you can find the answer in… Read more

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Just how annoying is the “You should just…” when you share something

Last week I observed someone who was sharing (with a certain amount of bravery I might add) the details of a breakup with a friend (sister?) in a cafe. They were met with a disappointing lack of empathy and a heap of really unhelpful “advice” they so clearly were SO not ready for. It was hard to hear! This is what I would have liked the friend/sister to have known… Just how annoying the “You should just…” is when you share something that is troubling you 🤔 Some of the time we are just venting or processing out loud and not looking for input or solutions. Having a solution rammed down our throat and our hurt invalidated does NOT feel good and it not helpful 😬 We can all get better at this and model helpful behaviour so we have more chance of getting it in return later. 🧚‍♀️ “That sounds hard. Tell me more” 🧚‍♀️ “That sounds really tough. Do you want to bounce possible solutions or do you just need to vent right now? What do you need? I’m listening”. 🧚‍♀️ ”I haven’t been in your shoes on this but I’d love to help you. What do you need most right now?” If someone is ASKING for your input and advice – give it! That fresh perspective can be SO helpful. But…listen closely before you jump in…ARE they asking for it yet?! 🤷‍♀️ Maybe the most helpful thing you can do in this moment is listen really closely and offer a shoulder. If you are not sure if… Read more

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Seriously people, we have to stop saying this…

If there is one phrase I would like to remove from the English language, it is “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”. Seriously people, we have to stop saying this to traumatised individuals. I realise it’s coming from a place of good intent and trying to be helpful, but, IT IS NOT. It utterly invalidates other people’s experience, pain and trauma…AND (as if that were not enough!) also implies they should somehow be GRATEFUL for their suffering as it’s creating some handy personal development 😲 I can’t even! I know when this has been said to me in the depths of personal hellscape, it made me feel… a) ANGRY (you want me to to grateful for this hell?) and b) ALONE (you obviously have NO IDEA what I am really going through here or you would not have said something so insulting / idiotic)   So, please let’s stop using this phrase, I know it’s well intentioned but it is unhelpful verging on damaging. If you are unsure of what to say to someone who is in a personal hellscape, try these instead.. “I’m so sorry you are experiencing this. I’m here for you in any way you need” or “I don’t know what to say but I do know I care about you deeply, and you can share anything you need with me, I’m here” or “This is all so shocking, it’s going to take you time to come to terms with it. I’m here for you” Because, whether what doesn’t kill you may or may not make… Read more

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